As Moms, we need to learn when to let it go...
Isn’t it funny how some people have it all figured it out?
Yes, it is funny, because thats a joke….hahaha, ( are you laughing?)
We always want the best for our kids, and thats no secret, but do we deserve the guilt, the doubt and all the heavy luggage that we carry with the name MOM on it?
NO, WE DONT. Even if deep inside you say: “I know I could do better”.
When We see our kids for the first time, all kinds of feelings flush into our veins and all kinds of thoughts rush through our minds. Its like we make a pact that you have to protect, teach, give, love, save and rescue this little amazing miracle bundle of innocence. Yes, in my opinion, every parent should feel this way. But we should not let those feelings blind us.
Its hard, we all know how hard it is, specially nowadays with all the exposure of everyones opinions and beautiful perfect “Photoshopped” lives on social media. But if you can trust me on this, nobody got it figure it out, even if they say or try to post it. We all struggle, we all question, we all judge every decision and sometimes every word that we give to our children….we all do it. ( even that perfect mother of 5 on Instagram that looks like she always have make up on, the house always clean, the kids always looking like if they came out of a magazine). If you think to yourself : “how does she do it? Its impossible!”…YOU ARE RIGHT. She is a human being, her kids are also human beings, just like yours, and all of that: its just a picture of what in your head is the perfect mother.
Dont believe me? Go spend a week at her house…I can almost garantee you that you will see some similarities and some differences but you would still choose your life.
We all compare the beauty in a picture, but there are so many things that a picture can’t show…and thats what we should focus. In how we feel, how we are inside, how each of our kids are so different, and what do they need from us in order to help them find their true beautiful unique selves.
The first thing they need from us is less comparison, less trying to be the Pinterest perfect family, and more exploring together the amazing things that are unique in each of us. Being proud of all of them.
Maybe you can’t keep your house spotless, maybe you are not very good in prepping meals for the whole week in advance, maybe you are like me that goes with the flow of what you have in your refrigerator and make something out of it…
Don’t try too hard being someone that your soul is not. Try harder to work with all the gifts that God gifted you and finding a middle ground so you can be the mirror for your kids, so they don’t have to compare themselves, or envy the lives of others, because they can see through the eyes of your soul how grateful you are for being you and for having them, just the way they are.
All the doubts we have about failing in giving what they need comes from our fear. Our fear has a lot of power, but is up to you to feed that fear…or let it starve until it knows you are not letting this rule your life.
So many times I get myself questioning about homeschooling, I want to protect them as much as I can, but then comes so many others questions, other comparisons, too many pros and too many cons. We get so tangled in those doubts, that what should be really important, gets buried underneath the insecurity of our own choices.
What do I do to narrow my forever going doubts, so I can move on instead of being stuck? I take a few deep breaths and ask myself some questions:
Is this something I can do, Is it possible?
Will it give you and your kids joy?
Will it be more frustrating than rewarding?
Is this something our family needs?
With just those few answers, if the majority of them, or at least the first one, deep inside your core says NO, then, you need to accept all the things you can’t control, practicing letting go of the attachment to fantasy instead of reality, you need to continuously doing the best that you can, being the Human Mother that you are, as you learn together with your kid how to create your OWN beautiful, amazing, unique, imperfect life choices and mistakes.
Let it Go Dear Moms. So you can start to be YOU!